Saturday, March 12, 2011

Old Friends and New

I'm heading off to visit with a college friend who has been ill. Two other friends will be joining us. We haven't been together since the early 80's. So much has changed since then. But I feel a bond that was there so many years ago. BUT, here's the problem. Back then, I did not talk about my abuse. It was a secret I kept well hid. I didn't know how to deal with it then, but I do now. So, do I share this with my friends?

I guess we'll have to see the level of honesty and openness that develops with us. All of us have had ups and downs, difficulties and victories, some things have happened that we could never have imagined. Can we trust and share? I guess that remains to be seen. I shall hold my peace and share if it is appropriate.

I think there are those who can handle that level of honesty and those who cannot. Discerning this can be difficult. As an abuse overcomer, I am learning to trust more and be open with others. Fear still jumps in there sometimes. But there is some level of caution that is necessary when sharing my past. So that is where the struggle lies. I am tempted to say nothing. But in a way that is denying myself with these friends. I guess I will have to trust my heart, my instincts and my faith. Hmmmm. Isn't that what a healthy, healed individual does?

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